I have been debating whether or not to blog for nearly 3 years. Not only was I worried about opening myself up to the world but the fact it could be triggering to myself.
When I first started self harming just after my mum's death I kept a little journal. I only posted in it maybe 10 times but it was really powerful stuff that then left me re-reading it and then harming more. So I stopped writing it.
Through twitter I've met some great people with bpd whom through their blogs I can relate to.Reading them helps remind me I'm not alone and all the things I feel with bpd are ok.
So on Monday I took my first steps into the world of blogging. Twitter is where I can be the real me so I wasn't afraid to share it through it. Facebook however is the false me and I just can't open up my blog to all my friends/family. Maybe one day I'll be strong enough but not yet. I did direct message my blog link to a handful of friends through Facebook. These were people who I knew wouldn't judge me. Their feedback has been positive thanking me for letting them in on something so private and telling me how brave I am. Brave I am not... Just trying to help spread awareness of bpd whilst trying to protect myself.
So after a week of blogging I feel i am doing the right thing. It hasn't triggered me so far and I feel it may be a new outlet when emotions get too much. If you are reading this and don't know whether to blog .... try it, even if no-one even reads this I'm not bothered it is helping me.
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